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They work great but they don’t come cheap. It’s roughly $1000 an inch.”The man perks up.“So,” the doctor says, “You must decide how many inches you want. But I understand that you have been married for over thirty years, and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now, she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before, and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.”The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.The doctor comes back the next day, “So, have you spoken with your wife?”“Yes I have,” says the man.“And has she helped you make a decision?”“Yes,” says the man.“What is your decision?” asks the doctor.“We’re getting granite countertops.”The Italian Gardner-Spring will be here before you know itAn elderly Italian gentleman lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was. A minute later she stood back to admire her handiwork with the satisfaction of an artist having created their magnum opus. ‘What lipstick do ya use?’ ‘Um…today it was a Max Factor Lipfinity one…but don’t ask me what colour.’ Sabrina responded. ‘Ya know ya feel really warm Miz Meadows…ya gotta’ be careful not to sweat too much or your foundation will just slide off ya face like a mudslide down a hill.’ The makeup girl offered. ‘I’ll try to keep that in mind.’ Sabrina said sarcastically. She was still feeling incredibly flustered and out of sorts due to her erotic daydream. Over the years since their secret dalliance Sabrina had thought of Alex fondly and remembered their time together with affection. She’d kept up with the news of his successes and projects but the only gossip she’d heard had been from the mouths of friends and colleagues as she didn’t think there were any creatures she could hate more than those of gossip writers and paparazzi so she kept away from the gossip.
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